You create something magical, in whatever form creation looks like for you, and you are so fucking excited to share it with the world. You’re so excited to tell all your favorite people what it means to you.
But the moment you do, it gets picked a part, and you feel that spark of light inside you begin to dim. You keep trying, though, because you always want the special people in your life to be proud of you and excited about your successes.
Over and over again, what excites you is picked apart and broken down. Until finally, you start to believe that you’re going to fail even before you start.
This is how the self-fulfilling prophecy works.
You get told for so long that something is not going to work, that you’re not good enough, and you internalize that as truth.
But you don’t stop being a human who creates things or becomes excited by things, even though this is the pattern that you live with in your reality.
You still create. You still have goals. You still have a vision of what life could be, of what you want it to be.
You may shoot for the stars in some areas, because you have a vision so big that you can’t help but want it…but in the back of your mind, you know it could be too big right now to achieve. You let the self-doubt that you’re good enough, that you could succeed, permeate your thoughts until it’s all that you can think about.
You fear that you can’t live up to the expectations that your loved ones have for you, but most of all you fear that you won’t live up to the expectations you set for yourself. You undervalue yourself. You undervalue your abilities. You don’t go for things that you be good at, because you don’t believe you’ll succeed.
Sometimes you set goals that seem impossible or overly challenging, because you know that you’ll fail, but you still tear yourself apart if you fall short of your definition of success. You don’t even realize it, until later, in hindsight, that you wound sabotaging your own success.
And those times what you do succeed? It boggles your mind, because it must be a fluke. It must be a random burst of good luck. It must have been because someone else HELPED you get there. It’s never because of your own abilities.
Close your eyes for a moment, and ask yourself…
Do I berate myself over the smallest mistakes?
Are my successes flukes, because of luck, or because someone or something else helped me?
Do you feel super sensitive whenever someone offers you criticism, or internalize constructive criticism as cruelty?
Do you feel like others might see you as a sham or a phony or a liar?
Do you consistently undervalue your own abilities and expertise? Even when you know that you could do amazing things in that area?
If you answered yes to three or more of these questions, then you’re struggling with imposter syndrome.
The intersection of the self-fulfilling prophecy and the imposter syndrome…
I believe that imposture syndrome and the self-fulfilling prophecy go hand in hand. The self-fulfilling prophecy is when you internalize your inability to do something and that your value is defined by your failures, and you make it your reality. You grow up feeling like an imposter and constantly get in your own way. You create this “insane goals” because they’re impossible to reach (in your mind).
Imposter syndrome and the self-fulfilling prophecy show up differently in everyone.
You may be the perfectionist, who is never happy with their performance; you may fixate on your flaws and pressure yourself to do everything perfectly.
You may push yourself as hard as you can, over extend yourself, because you feel so inadequate. You have to be the superhero in your own story, but all you do is exhaust yourself and find yourself failing because you’re so burnt out.
You may be the one who needs to ensure that you’re the expert before you can share your wisdom or abilities with anyone else. You find yourself never happy with how much you know, or even believing you’ll never know enough, so you’re constantly seeking out more knowledge. All the certifications and knowledge in the world won’t help you if you’re undervaluing your ability to share that with others.
You may be the one who is naturally smart or gifted, so you set huge goals for yourself and want success right away. As an overachiever like this, you might not realize that you may need to build to that new reality that you’re picturing. And when you fall short of those big dreams, you feel crushed and broken.
And, finally, you may be the one who believes that no one else can help you, that you have to do it all on your own. Your value is defined by how productive you are, and you don’t let anyone else in. Asking for help, receiving help, is a weakness. You have to do it all on your own, because you would be a failure if you needed someone else.
It is also possible that you may experience varying levels of all these ways that the self-fulfilling prophecy and imposter syndrome can show up in your life.
So, what is the answer? How to you push past your own thoughts, feelings, and behaviors to finally dismantle this self-sabotaging belief system that you’re not good enough?
Creating healthy boundaries, with others and yourself, and building your self-confidence are crucial for dismantling the pervasive, negative belief systems that come with the self-fulfilling prophecy and the imposter syndrome. It’s time to reprogram those beliefs into more empowered and aligned beliefs that honor you for who you are, an amazing, powerful, beautiful person who deserves to feel and be happy, successful, and confident.
I am excited to announce that I have created a new program that will help you do just that.
Supercharge Your Self-Confidence: a Transformational Hypnocoaching Program to Help You Boost Your Self-Confidence
This program is a 6-month, individual hypnocoaching program that will change your life for the better!
This amazing program features 12 bi-weekly, 90-minute sessions. It is a mixture of mindset coaching and hypnotherapy, and the sessions are designed to help you reprogram your disempowering beliefs in a safe, relaxing way. You’ll soon find yourself living the life of your dreams without ever realizing things would be any different.
I am offering this program at a very low price for the initial run of the program. I am accepting 10 clients for the first run, beginning in April 2021. If you’re interested in the waitlist for this program, sign up using the link below.
The current cost of the program for April 2021 is 6 monthly payments of $434 or 14 biweekly payments of $200.